Sexuality & Gender 101

I am currently pregnant with my first child. People are already asking, “Do you know the baby’s gender?” The fact of the matter is: this growing baby has no gender. She has developed a biological sex but, as of this moment, she is unaware of the cultural implications that will develop because of her sex. As explained in the video above, gender is socially constructed. We learn gender through repeated patterns of socialization. Young boys hear things like, “Big boys don’t cry" while girls are told to “act like a lady.” My daughter's gender is a blank slate. Or, at least, it was.

Recently, while registering for our baby shower, our registry attendant told us that knowing this baby is a girl will make things so much easier for us – “Just pick the pink stuff,” she said. And so it begins. The process of gender socialization is already well underway for this 1 lb. unborn baby.

But what does gender socialization mean on a greater scale? What implications does it have in our society and in our day-to-day lives? Why is it so important for counselors to know and understand the differences between sex and gender?

I hope to answer those questions in the following posts. I hope that you will learn about the role that feminist therapy plays and how it can be utilized by counselors to benefit their clients.  

Feminist Therapy: What Is It?

Feminist therapy is unique in that it does not have one major therapeutic approach. The theory grew out of the 1970s women’s movement, combining aspects of social constructivist and social justice movement thoughts, and focusing both on the psychological and the sociological factors of the client’s life.

Feminist therapy challenges gender biases and gender role expectations, criticizes traditional systems of psychotherapy, challenges masculine interpretations of human behavior, and aims for a more egalitarian society.

Social Activism: Miss Representation

"The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don't have any."  - Alice Walker 

American teenagers spend 31 hours a week watching television, 17 hours a week listening to music, 3 hours a week watching movies, 4 hours a week reading magazines, 10 hours a week online. That's a total of 10 hours a 45 minutes of media consumption a day. 

From "bitch" to "ditz," women are labeled in the media every single day. Unrealistic beauty ideals are plastered on the covers of magazines, DVDs, and film posters. It is hard to escape the gender stereotypes that exist in America. 

In most societies, there is a great deal of power differentiation between the genders. In American society, this is clearly exemplified by the objectification of women in popular media messaging. Women are sold the idea that their bodies are their worth. Men are sold the idea that they are the in control of those sexualized bodies and that they hold the power. Here are some examples: 

(Found at: www.mimifroufrou.com)

(Found at: www.thespinalley.co.uk) 

(Found at: www.tressugar.com)

(Found at: www.foodrepublic.com)

(Found at: http://easterncce.blogspot.com)

So what does this all mean? What implications does it have for the young men and women of our country? What does it say about our society as a whole? Can this problem be fixed? Where do we even start? 

Social activism is an approach used by some counselors in an attempt to combat the ills of society. Adopting the notion that "the personal is political," some counselors believe that in order to best advocate for their clients, championing social justice issues is a must.

Counselors interested in social activism can opt to take part in protests, letter-writing campaigns, attending judicial hearings and congressional meetings, and other forms of activism in order to lobby for social change. 

This video gives surprising statistics about the current state of media consumption in America, as well as helpful suggestions for women (and girls) to help fight against the current narrative. Counselors interested in social activism could print these suggestions on a handout to give to their clients. 

Suggestions include:  

Get Healthy

• Be conscious of your media consumption, online and off 
• Take a media break 
• Focus on achievement over appearance 

Value Yourself 

• Find what makes you happy 
• Appreciate your uniqueness 
• Celebrate your accomplishments 

Be a Role Model 

• Personify the characteristics you hope to see in the world around you 
• Be a mentor to others 

Get Involved 

• Volunteer in your local community 
• Boycott harmful media 
• Use your voice to create change online and off 

Be a Leader 

• Don't be afraid to step into leadership roles 
• Encourage and invest int he leadership of other women 
• Remember that you are the lead character in the story of your life 

The Role of Men: Tough Guise

Gender role expectations and stereotypes do not exist only for women. In his documentary "Tough Guise," Jackson Katz attempts to raise public consciousness regarding masculinity stereotypes that exist in modern American culture. 

Katz makes the argument that young men are expected to fit into a very narrow box - tough, strong, powerful, aggressive. The insults hurled at men who do not conform to those stereotypes, words like wimp, fag, and sissy, are used to keep men in that narrow box. They are limited by the cultural expectations of our society. Serious and often dangerous implications of these limitations can follow - murder, assault, and other forms of violent behavior. 

So what does this mean for American boys? What can counselors do to help with what seems to be such a systemic problem, engrained deep into the fabric of our society?  

Counselors can apply consciousness raising in their practice by creating small, leaderless groups where members can examine how oppression and gender stereotyping leads to dysfunction and disempowerment in their own lives. Feminist therapy does not deal only with women. Men should not only be included in this therapy but should also be encouraged to express their own gender role restraints and limitations, as their voices are of great importance as well.